I woke up on my birthday early. Even with the recent time change, my bedroom was still dark as my eyes opened at 4:30 am. I lay in bed for a long while, soaking in the stillness of the morning, thanking God for another year and praying. Part of my prayer was that on my next birthday (my 33rd) at this very hour, I would be gently rocking my baby in my arms.
As I prayed; a vision came to me so perfectly and so clearly that I could actually feel what it would be like to be in that space.
There I was just a few doors down from my bedroom, the once empty room – now a soothing and comforting nursery… rocking in a chair that glided easily in a back and forward motion while cuddling my little one in my arms…maybe I am breastfeeding her or simply cooing her back to sleep, but there we are together; momma and baby. I take turns studying her face and looking out the window at the birch trees as they sway from side to side. Their golden leaves dancing in the wind, some leaving the safety of their branch-swirling down to earth.. ever so delicately…I look back to my little one and our eyes lock in knowingness that our long standing prayers have been answered at last.
Yes this is my birthday prayer and I will do my best, no matter the disappointment and heartache of this journey, to continue to visualize this until it becomes a reality.